Friday 28 December 2007

Update XIV: Reboot

I'm in the school library, and it's cold. For a while I even thought my pants were wet (they're not). I'm waiting on my Final Year Project team members, who are currently late and can only get later. Since there's nothing much else to do, we have a blog entry.

My computer Orpheus has been sick over the past few days, down with a little nasty it picked up from BZP which apparently allows other viruses in. (We don't recommend that you go there right now with Internet Explorer. The exploit is still there - I'd have gotten it again, only my new Spybot-S&D Resident caught the registry change and stopped it. Firefox is apparently immune, so no worries if you use it.) Of course, this just had to happen when I was in the middle of writing my FYP report.

Well, Orpheus is back now, and healthier. I think he needed the reformat anyway, but I could have done without having to painfully get back all the programs, drivers, security updates and whatnot. The IT Helpdesk never reinstalls things the same way twice, and I'm still missing the Chinese language pack. Graagh.

Enough whining from me. It is, after all, the day after Boxing Day, which in actual fact has nothing to do with the sport, but with boxes. And this has been a nice Christmas season for me. My mother made her trademark French-style roast chicken, there was much pudding with custard, and I got to catch up with old friends. Also, my father gave me a wrapped present.

It was a Cornetto. He is very lame sometimes.

I have two shout-outs, which coincide with the two restaurants I had the opportunity to visit this holiday season. One is for Marché, a nice little restaurant in Vivocity (there may be more outlets, but I'm only aware of this one). The restaurant is market-style, with stalls in the middle and the dining tables around the edges. At the entrance you are given a card; you then walk around the stalls picking out what you want to eat. The food is prepared right in front of you, the chef at the stall swipes your card, and you only pay at the end when you leave. The prices are reasonable, the food is very, very good and you have the assurance that nothing shady happened to it during preparation. The interior decoration has a homely, countryside-esque aesthetic, so the atmosphere is very cosy. It's a great place, and the only drawback is that it's in Vivocity which is navigational hell. If you don't mind overcrowded mazes, Marché is worth checking out.

The other is DÔME Café, where D3 went for lunch yesterday. The food is also superb in general, though we did agree that pizza is clearly not their speciality. Nevertheless the sandwiches seemed good, and they make a heavenly tiramisu. But what really impressed me was the service - the waitresses were genuinely nice to us, and really made us feel welcome. As a MasterCard advertisement would say - priceless.

But now the holiday season is behind us, and it's time for serious work again. So we go back to me, freezing in the overly-empty library, wishing my team members would freaking hurry up so we can get started on our project poster, typing up a blog entry on stolen time.

I could really do with a sandwich.

Tuesday 18 December 2007

Converging to a Point

The hurdles are overcome, one by one. I went for my medical check-up today, and though I don't know how my chest X-ray went, the rest of it was fine. The tuition grant business also seems to be more or less settled. New passport is ready for collection. All I need are my IELTS results, and I'm ready to fly off.

Well, not entirely ready, but all that remains would be insignificant details like sorting out what to take and saying goodbye to everything I've ever known. The easy stuff.

(I realise that the rule is "sarcasm does not translate over the internet". So to clarify, that was sarcasm. Thank you and have a nice day.)

Oh, and I finished my Christmas shopping. While staying within budget. This is an amazing thing which may never happen again.

So I'm calm now. It's not going to last, but I've found my centre for the time being.

Take care.

Monday 17 December 2007

Hady Mirza Wins Asian Idol

The news should be all over Singapore by now, but for anyone disconnected from reality... The second Singapore Idol, Hady Mirza, won the first Asian Idol contest last night. Read all about it here.

So my classmates were actually discussing this about last week, and the consensus seemed to be he'd be voted out at the earliest opportunity. Long years of participating in contests, and failing to get anywhere in said contests, has convinced the general populace that Singapore Never Wins.

Singapore won last night. It's actually won several times in the past, but apparently no one was paying attention then. Well, this was front-page news, so pay attention now. Fellow Singaporeans, it's time to start believing in your own country again.

Sunday 9 December 2007

Puffball Fungus

La la la WISHLIST la la la...

1) Anything Bionicle-related (I didn't get any sets again this year... sniff...)
2) Anything car-related
3) Anything shiny (shiny-shiny!)
4) Transformers DVD
5) Chocolate!
6) Universal peace and love

I doubt I'm getting the last one. It's kinda expensive.

Mandatory disclaimer - the above list is only for those who are out of ideas. Y'all know that you have the habit of getting me stuff I didn't even know I wanted. Actually, as long as it's from you guys I'll treasure it anyway, simply because it's something you picked out with me in mind.

Right, I think we've reached our daily sap quota around here. Moving on...

Mariem, you're the only one left who hasn't compiled a wishlist now. HA! Fortunately I know just what to get for you.

Also, I'll make chocolate lava cake if I can possibly manage it (i.e. it doesn't harden into regular cake). Let me know what's happening with the annual meeting, 'kay?

Before I go, I believe a puffball fungus was promised. Here's one, courtesy of Google image search:


(Image originally from here.)

Peace out.

Sunday 25 November 2007

MORE FORMS

For the record, applying for a visa with a third-world country's passport sucks. I can't wait to become a Singapore citizen so I don't have to deal with all this paperwork.

I finished wading through the last of the visa application forms, but it's not over yet - I still have to get a medical examination, X-ray and take an IELTS test. Yes, apparently studying in Singapore all my life and getting A1 for O' Level English are inadequate indications of sufficient English proficiency to survive in Australia.

Oh, and of course the agent only saw fit to inform me about this English language requirement now.

... Sorry. Tight deadlines make the Wintershark cranky.

On a more optimistic note, as part of my effort to gain some cooking skills before heading off to live on my own, I made chicken curry today. It turned out... surprisingly good. Though I'll probably substitute the coconut milk with regular milk next time - you can practically see the unhealthiness floating around in it.

I guess I'm finally getting my cooking skills under control - last week I made chocolate fudge for the class, and it was quite popular. It'll be nice if I finally overcome all my cooking handicaps. Especially those relating to potatoes. I am terrible at preparing potatoes.

Last thing - Indestruc2Tank, the sequel to IndestructoTank, came out a short while ago. Surprisingly enough, this sequel is even better than the original, and proves to be the superior timewaster. Go check it out.

Til next time.

Saturday 17 November 2007

Just...Whoa

The world of Bionicle has received some... interesting news over the past week. And by interesting, I mean Holy Fishsticks!



Note: If you want a text-free version of this image, get it here.


So the new Bionicle Ignition comic arrived, and, well... BZP member Dokuma was kind enough to post some scans here.

Okay, so... Point #1. Mata Nui has been saved. The universe will not die. That's a relief. We sorta knew it would happen though. That's not the earth-shaking news.

No, the earth-shaking news is this is the first time a major character, who has been in the story since its beginnings in 2001, who has four sets to his name, has died. This is significant, because it shows that the story is becoming a lot more serious. The world of Bionicle is dangerous, and the story-writers are not afraid to show it.

But more importantly, this death wasn't for some random reason like self-sacrifice. Why do I dislike self-sacrifice? Because more often than not it is a waste, that's why, especially since it seems only the competent, highly-skilled characters enjoy throwing their lives away. Unless the character is the entire reason that the trouble started, or unless the death immediately frees the universe of all evil, self-sacrifice simply leaves one less hero to deal with the bad guys. Sure, it wins the battle, but at what cost to the war? Life is a profound thing, and there are always better ways for it to be of use than discarding it.

This was different. The mask chose Matoro. Something, possibly the mask itself, told him to put it on. It was his destiny, and like every good Toa, he accepted it. In doing so he became a hero. His death is something to be remembered and respected, because unlike the typical self-sacrifice, it actually meant something.

You did good, Lego. Well done.

...But for heaven's sake don't resurrect him later.

Thursday 8 November 2007

Ruined FOREVER

This article on the Teletraan-1 wiki TFWiki resonated strongly with me (besides making me laugh like a maniac, that is). It certainly seemed to recall the sentiments of the ever-vigilant Bionicle fans, who speedily send out alerts at the slightest sign of Bionicle assuming a descending course. It also got me thinking - why do so many Bionicle fans believe their favourite fictitious universe is going downhill? Is it really going downhill? To answer these questions, I trawled through the latest "Bionicle Going Downhill" topics, braving bad grammar, heated opinions and poor logic, from there deriving the possible events which may have affected Bionicle negatively. And now, fresh from my learning journey, I present the top ten occasions which ruined Bionicle...FOREVER.

DUN-DUN-DUN-DUN!


1) When the Olda Went Nuva

Before this event, the most the Toa ever changed was when they formed Wairuha and Akamai; individually, their main physical alteration was through the acquisition of gold masks. The transformation into their Nuva forms represented the first significant physical change for the Toa, supplying them with new masks, new weapons and entirely-rebuilt bodies. Ever since then change has become the norm; our current Toa team Jaller and co already went through two physical transformations as Matoran, and two more as Toa (and this is unlikely to be the end of their changes).

One reason this was important is that it represented the first major shift in storytelling; instead of controlling the storyline dynamics by altering the type of enemies the Toa faced, it altered them through changing the Toa themselves. Another part of this was that each new transformation brought in new masks and new powers, eventually completely unrelated to the original twelve masks and elemental powers, as well as altered weapon and body designs. These frequent redesigns lead to - shall I say it? - increasingly ugly characters. In the past masks were simple, sculpted with the eyes, occasionally a mouth-part, and some random vents or tubes for cool factor. Nowadays, you can hardly tell where the face is. The other complaint is that with the glut of new masks and powers, the old masks and powers are losing their significance. These days, its not about what you can achieve with a Mask of Levitation and a Mask of Speed combined. It's about using Fate, Reanimation, and whatever other odd powers are out there. It's almost a form of cheating.

(Seriously, though. Reanimation. As in zombies. Braaaiins...)


2) When Books Came In

Okay, the books. Now they were probably a good idea - they fill in a lot of blanks which games and comics cannot cover, provide explanations for mysteries and allow for deeper characterisation of heroes and villains alike. They helped to bring the storyline closer to the fans. They fleshed out the Bionicle universe in far greater detail than a bunch of images, or even a movie, ever could have.

The problem started when blanks were deliberately left in the storyline to allow material for the books. Suddenly a significant portion of the year's story was available only in books which, unlike previous sources of information, were not readily available internationally and which were most certainly not free. Comics, once the mainstay of Bionicle storytelling, became disjointed and increasingly difficult to follow. There were no more full-length games like MNOG, which pretty much covered the main points for the storyline that year. An increasingly-complex storyline only served to complicated matters further. The result? Confusion. And that, of course, eventually lead to apathy in these confused fans. You can't love something if you can't even maintain a connection to it.


3) When We Stopped Counting in Sixes

In the beginning, there were six elements and six Toa. There were six Great masks and six Noble masks, six villages headed by six Turaga with six staffs of office. Later in the story six types of Bohrok came along, but they were defeated by the six Toa wielding six golden masks which were each formed from the powers of six Great Kanohi. These six Toa became six Toa Nuva, and along with their transformation six Nuva symbols appeared. These six Nuva symbols were stolen by six Bohrok-Kal and would have been used to open the six-sided Nuva cube, but fortunately Tahu stopped them with the extra Kanohi he had in his possession, the Mask of Time...

Wait, what?

Okay, so the Mask of Time wasn't a bad thing, even if it did look like it was crafted from Swiss cheese. (I heard a rumour that it was put in due to input from Bionicle fans. Hmm.) But then we have a special golden mask, for the Seventh Toa Who Will Save Us All. When we get to the Metru Nui prequel, we find the only Toa in attendance is Lhikan - all the others are dead, banished or mutated. And suddenly something about eleven Toa fighting a Kanohi Dragon comes up. Eleven, mind you! Not a multiple of six! And now we're told there are fifty-six Toa in all. Again, not a multiple of six.

This issue isn't so much about numbers as patterns. It used to be that the old format was maintained through each storyline - six heroes, one destiny, bad guys who will be defeated by the end of the year thanks to the combined heroism of the Toa and Matoran. Repair, rebuild, repeat. The challenge was to make each cycle interesting with added twists, such as the unexpected addition of the Bahrag, Makuta coming back, and so on. But now the story has veered from the pattern entirely. Toa could appear from anywhere, at anytime. The heroes can and do lose. Remember when Matoran didn't die/stay dead? Well, that's no longer true either. Matoran die all the time. So do Toa. Suddenly, so many possibilities have opened up. While this has allowed for more story, it's uncomfortable. The old universe we once knew, with its set rules and patterns, is now gone. Bionicle has become frighteningly like real life. That's not what we stayed for, six years ago on that Ta-Wahi beach.


4) When You Were Not the First Toa

Ahh, retrocons. Don't we all just love them? Bionicle has had more than its fair share of them, starting with the prequel Metru and Hordika arcs. It gets pretty annoying too, when a past you thought stretched out to one thousand years ago, tops, actually started one hundred thousand years ago... but that's not what I'm talking about here. I'm talking about how suddenly, six new Toa were introduced from nowhere.

As I mentioned above, there used to be a pattern to things. One constant to the pattern was that there were only six Toa, period. These Toa could go Nuva or whatever other fancy changes, but it appeared that we'd always have Tahu, and Kopaka, and the rest of the gang.

But Vakama's line introduced the idea that they were not the first Toa or, to put it in a more significant light, not the only Toa. Since then all kinds of Toa have appeared in the storyline. At the moment the known teams are the Mahri, Hagah and Nuva, as well as some others still alive, but at one point there were 3000 Toa in existence. In plain terms... that's a lot of Toa. Throw in some personality changes due to transformation, and you've got what amounts to... even more Toa.

What did this all mean? Basically, a set of ever-changing main characters who were difficult to get to know, to get attached to, even if you kept your focus on the six/seven central Toa of the year. Once you figured out the dynamics of one Toa team and decided who you liked best, they went and changed again, or were replaced by an entirely new Toa team, or plain died. With all these Toa coming and going, it become hard to get attached to any characters, especially when favourite Matoran suddenly become Toa as well. Change is good, but too much change? Especially when fans are barely allowed to get acquainted with the characters? Now that's just depressing.


5) When Metru Nui was the REAL Homeland

In spite of Metru Nui being the real homeland of the Matoran, at least the more vocal fans don't seem to accept that anything but Mata Nui truly deserves to be called home. I tend to agree. Metru Nui was retroconned into the storyline. It's a nice city, but it's not where we started out.

The shift from Mata Nui to Metru Nui marked the first of several broader changes to the overall plotline. The most obvious was a departure from the tribal society of the Matoran, moving towards a more science-fiction feel with the introduction of projectile weapons, cities and advanced transportation systems, not to mention technological explanations for what were once taken as mystical occurrences. As I've explained before, a reason a storyline may lose fans is when it alters what was originally attractive to those fans. Well, for some fans part of the original attraction was that tribal, low-tech feel. Unfortunately, the trend of newer storylines doesn't suggest that this old feel will ever come back.


6) When They Started Making Ammo

Or, more precisely, when Kanoka appeared, in the 2004 Metru Nui storyline. Discs had been available before in the earliest toys, but there were only six and they weren't the main collectible of that year. In 2004 they were, and in fact every collectible since then has been a projectile for use with some sort of weapon.

Backtrack a little. The very first collectible, Kanohi, came in twelve different designs. Krana and Krana-Kal came in eight designs. Kraata had six design variations plus the special Shadow Kraata. Each of these designs came in multiple colours to enhance collectability.

Every single Kanoka had exactly the same design, with the only variation being colour. As did the Rhotuka. As did the Zamor. As did the recent Sea Squids. You getting my drift here? There has not been a really good collectible since the Kraata. In fact, the later collectibles have been becoming even less collectible, being produced in fewer colours.

It's kinda sad, really. In the old days fans would trade and buy for the sake of a complete collection. Nowadays there's really nothing to brag about if you've got every single colour of Sea Squid.


7) When Articulation Became the Norm

Okay, so articulation doesn't seem to be the real problem, and let's be honest, articulation in toys is a good thing... What fans really seem to be worried about is a change in the way sets are built. Part of it is that sets used be challenging to put together, even with a small number of pieces. They also used to be assembled from familiar old pieces found in other Technic sets. Nowadays, pieces are customised specially for characters. It's... cheating, I suppose? The view is apparently that, if pieces are going to be custom-molded, the set might as well be replaced by an action figure.

The reason pieces have to be customised so much nowadays is the increasingly organic designs of their characters. Let's face it, it isn't possible to build spines with Technic pieces (well, you could, but you would need a lot of pieces and the result would be a Titan). Unfortunately, these organic designs are a complaint in themselves. It is certainly different from the mechanical sensibilities of older sets.

And then there are the gimmicks, like the light-up weapons and glowing skulls of the Inika, not to mention increasingly creative canister designs. While these aren't really an issue, what they may be contributing to the overall price, is. Bionicle sets have been getting steadily more expensive, at a rate which can't entirely be due to inflation. For those who don't like gimmicks and don't care what the canister looks like, the price hike would seem unfair.


8) When Values Stopped Mattering

Amazingly, Bionicle villains had values. The Bohrok largely left the Toa alone as long as they did not interfere with their mission. Even the supposedly evil-beyond-redemption Makuta didn't tear up Takanuva the minute he met him; instead, he proposed a Kolhii match. The Toa Metru Onewa, Whenua and Nuju were not slaughtered after their capture, merely locked up. While the Bionicle villains were evil, and willing to cause mass destruction, there seemed to be an element of decency in their operations.

Roodaka seemed to be the first villain willing to break this mould; she was openly cruel and manipulative. The Piraka were willing to fire on each other, never mind at the heroes, and the Barraki have shown to be even harsher - Pridak blinded one of Kalmah's eyes and Takadox has hypnotised Carapar for years. Decency is completely out of the window.

Is it a coincidence then that the three values Unity, Duty and Destiny have not made an appearance for years? I'm not one for preaching, but those Virtues, and the accompanying Principles, seemed to give the Matoran meaning for what they do, for what they fight for. But that's been gone lately. It just seems that a part of Bionicle - a fairly big part, considering the importance of the virtues in the Mask of Light saga - simply disappeared.

Where would Bionicle be without the rallying call of "Unity! Duty! Destiny!"?


9) When it Turned Out Makuta is a Species - Wait, What?

If there is any villain in Bionicle who has been overused, it is Makuta. He's been there from the beginning, involved in every single major plot in Bionicle. The Rahi and Rahkshi attacks were of course controlled by him, but so was the early release of the Bohrok. The Great Cataclysm was his doing. Roodaka was acting on his behalf. The Piraka's decisions were under his subliminal influence; Zamor spheres consisted of his essence. Oh, and he's still around, by the way, disguised as Maxilos.

And now it seems that there's a whole gang of them.

This isn't so much about brand dilution. Makuta has received far too much character development to lose his significance so easily, and in being the leader of the Brotherhood of Makuta, he has if anything proven he is more awesome than before. What has happened is a sudden complexity in the storyline. Factions are coming in left, right and center, with their own island bases. There's now a humongous backstory behind everything. Did you know that the Barraki first put the idea in Makuta's head to overthrow Mata Nui? Or that Takua was really a Matoran of Light? Oh, and by the way, there was once this organisation called the Hand of Artakha...

Compounded with much of this story being told through books (see point #2 above) and dispersed across a variety of media, it is becoming increasingly hard to keep track of everything. The return of the BIONICLEsector01 wiki has at least provided a centralised location for all this information, but it still requires a lot of heavy reading to keep up with the story. While there are fans who are willing to do this, there are also those who can't or won't. A storyline which becomes too complex can only be expected to alienate some of its original fans.


10) When They Started Answering Our Questions

The ability to ask Greg Farshtey questions about the storyline, questions which would actually be honestly answered, was both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it has enabled us to know far more about the intricacies behind the story than we ever would have. (There may even have been a reverse effect, with the story being fleshed out further to answer certain questions. This is pure speculation of course.) On the other hand, maybe we didn't actually want to know?

I'm going to have to refer to something I wrote again - I said before that when there are gaps in the storyline, fans like to fill them with a version of events they like. If someone happens to ask a question about this gap from Mr. Farshtey, and it fits into the fan's personal canon, the fan is happy. If it doesn't, on the other hand, well...

And no, it isn't any use saying "If you don't like the storyline, write fanfiction." Fanfiction-writers want to be in tune with the story. Their writings are an exploration of the plot landscape, but they don't always want to deviate from it. A fan is, after all, a fan. They are supposed to embrace the fictitious universe whole-heartedly. Fans do want details, but they want details which fit in with their perceptions of what would make a good story. Selfish but true.

I'm not blaming anyone here, least of all Mr. Farshtey who has been amazingly patient with fans. Certainly no one could have foreseen the effects of knowing too much. But once you challenge a fan's idea of how the story goes, some unhappiness must be expected. And providing any kind of information, especially storyline and character details, will inevitably challenge someone's perceptions, somewhere. Equally inevitably, it will satisfy some other fans for whom the new information fits with their idea of a good story, or even surpasses it. And this last group will want to know more, right up to the point they find out something they don't like. It's human nature, but is this "Ruined Forever" issue about anything but human nature?


Because that's what this is all about. I have named ten points which supposedly ruined Bionicle forever, but did they really? Some of them are annoying, yes. Some were the turning points at which the old story we knew became a different kind of story. Some changed the dynamics of Bionicle fandom forever. But...ruined? I arranged my points in a roughly chronological order according to when they happened. If Bionicle really was ruined for the entire fanbase, some of these offences wouldn't even have been able to occur. But Bionicle is still here in spite of everything.

For I believe that whether one sees Bionicle as going uphill or downhill depends entirely on perception. There are impartial indicators such as sales figures, and they indicate success as far as we've been told. Gauging how much it succeeded for you depends on what you want from it. If you wanted a good-versus-evil story set in a tribal community... sorry. If you wanted underwater fights and lots of detailed backstory, then you must be very happy right now. If organic-looking sets are your thing, then Bionicle is definitely going uphill.

If you're like me, who just wants a good story with a few souvenirs (read: sets) thrown in, what you see is equilibrium. It's not going uphill or downhill, but it's travelling, level as the ground may be. And that's all I ask.

So let's all turn to the real point at which Bionicle was ruined forever: when Lego tried to make money from it. Ever since they did that, Bionicle has been completely ruined, with the storyline sacrificed to cater to newbie fans who don't understand the true spirit of Bionicle. At all. Why, every true Bionicle fan knows that if Bionicle had stayed centered on one island with the same enemy every year...


Final Thoughts

Wow, this is a long essay. I'm almost afraid to perform a word count...
...3210 words. Quaint.

I enjoyed writing this, because in finding out why fans dislike changes in Bionicle, I've come to realise what I love about it. I've also realised that time fuels acceptance. Do you know that I used to dislike Vahki?

Besides, in researching this article I had to re-watch the old Bionicle movies. Fans, if you ever feel yourself losing faith, watch the movies again - the Flash movies if you must. They will recall to you what you once loved. For while new legends awake, old lessons must be remembered...

This is the way, of the Bionicle.

(Edited 5 October 2008)

Monday 5 November 2007

And Coming in at Number 75...

Or, Update XIII. Because 13 is unlucky and stuff.

So... Feeling a lot better now. Part of blogging is for catharsis, and writing about things tends to put them in order.

I was thinking about evil twins, and I've come to the conclusion that they would do better if the whole Spot the Imposter thing was skipped. I mean, come on. It is always painfully obvious who the evil one is, even if it doesn't sport a goatee. Because, you know, evil twins are supposed to be, I don't know, evil? And then the audience has to watch everyone else bungle around trying to figure out who the imposter is, when anyone with the slightest bit of sense would have spotted them from the outset.

No, better to skip all that and go straight to the real reason evil twins are a threat: they usually have similar skills to the good guy, so all the old favourite tricks don't work. The good guy has to really think about how the evil twin should be defeated. And that makes for a great story. This is probably the reason why KARR is such a great evil twin. (Well, that, and the fact that KARR is so deliciously devious and yet endearingly naïve.)

So... If you ever set up an evil twin story, please, please skip that hey-who's-the-real-hero routine. It's lame. Really.

Okay, so... You know the game, Minesweeper? Pretty much every modern Windows machine has a copy of the game. It stands up there with Solitaire as one of the most stereotypically common games ever.
Fanfiction.net has a section for Minesweeper.
They were right. The Internet really does have everything.
...There's a Minesweeper movie trailer too.

While browsing deviantART the other day, I came across this.
SO COMPLETELY TRUE. Even when I watched the film at the tender age of five, I thought the Beast was way handsomer than that man-person he turns into at the end. I guess even then I was tired of the prettyboy-prince-who-always-gets-the-girl stereotype, and was gratified to see a more imperfect character find happiness. And was subsequently annoyed when this original twist was ruined by reverting to the same old boring stereotype at the end.

Besides, the Beast had a nice deep voice, while the Prince... ugh.

In real-life news, Halloween was fairly fun. No one in my class dressed up, but we had a candy party. One classmate ate half a box of Gobstoppers without realising it. Though that may have been partially due to the very frustrating piece of software we had to deal with that day. (Seriously, if you are going to work freeware into a lesson, make sure it is easily downloadable and compatible with common operating systems first.)
...Squeee!

One more thing. It's Guy Fawkes Day.

Remember, remember, the Fifth of November,
The Gunpowder Treason and Plot,
I know of no reason
Why Gunpowder Treason
Should ever be forgot.


Try not to set fire to anything.

Saturday 3 November 2007

Hour Zero

So, I've been wrapping up the loose ends of Crunch Time. Much of it is done - I've exactly two more strings to tie up, and that's it.

And then it'll be time to fly off to Australia.

I'm terrified. I've never lived in another country for more than three weeks, and certainly not on my own. Certainly never for nine months in a country I've never been to before, where I'll have to cook, clean and take care of myself and four room-mates. Four room-mates who don't see what is wrong with taking the lift down one floor and who have been tended to by maids for the most of their lives. Oh lord, am I supposed to protect them all?

What will I take along? The Microns and the sketchbook come of course, but what about the watercolours? The compasses? Should I bring my favourite Bionicle set along with me for reassurance? Or should I leave him at home where he'll be safe? What do I do if I leave something important at home because I sure as heck can't go back for it? If I take my laptop with me, what do I do if it breaks down there? How will I manage without my home?

I'm not ready to leave. But I never will be. There'll come the day of the flight and the aeroplane will whisk me away and after that, then I'll be ready. And then I'll read this entry and laugh at what I used to be. I can't laugh now, because it's not funny now.

I'm dead, dead scared. I'm moving because it is the only thing to do, because time waits for no-one. More than anything I want to know that everything will be alright, but the future hurries for no-one, least of all me.

I wish this were all over.

Sunday 7 October 2007

Update XII: At Least it's Not an Oxymoron

So... I guess I should post something, huh?

Time hasn't been very spare with me lately. (When is it ever, really?) Another of those crunch-time moments is coming up soon. Part of it is voluntary, but... You know, "voluntary" is a loaded word. No one ever does anything for no reason. There's always honor, or morals, or... something. And those things are as compelling, if not more so, as a paycheck.

It occurs to me that I love to help people - in a way, do voluntary work. And it doesn't have to be important stuff - I've put aside my homework before to help someone finish a computer game. I've always thought that this was because I love challenges, but now... I'm starting to wonder if it is a form of self-validation. That I'm afraid I'm of no real use to anyone, and I have to continuously work for others to prove my place in the world.

That's would certainly explain why my failures cost so much emotionally.

Okay, so... we were watching MythBusters yesterday. (Well, my father and brother was watching. My drawing table has a decent view of the television, so I glanced up every now and then.) There was this one myth about Western movies, where one guy hitches up the window grille of a jail cell to a horse and pulls the bars out for his companion can escape. So the MythBusters people built up an old-style jail cell wall with railroad ties, the way they used to be built, put in a window grille, tied a rope from the grille to a horse and tried to pull it off.

The thing is, they were doing it entirely wrong. See, their idea was that you have to break part of the wall to get out the bars, so they tied the rope in a loop around all the bars. (That got them nowhere - even a truck they used to replace the horse started to pull the entire wall along with the grille.) But in Westerns, the rope is always tied around the middle bar only. The idea here is to bend the bars, so their width reduces and the entire grille can be pulled out easily, with little to no damage to the wall. The show entirely missed that out.

Now I'm not saying that tying the rope to the middle bar would have guaranteed that the grille could be pulled out. I'm saying there would have been a better chance of doing so. Besides, that would have been more authentic to the myth which the show was trying to test in the first place. I guess what I mean is that MythBusters is just a commercial programme, and its findings should not be taken to represent the whole truth.

In other news... this doesn't surprise me. I mean it does a little, but not by much. Half of us never check food labels anyway, and when there are fewer people doing something, there are fewer who can bring up issues with them, so it does make sense that food labels are not written in a manner consumers can understand.
(Note that the study size was quite small, so I would take its findings with a pinch of salt in any case.)

Now this, on the other hand, is mind-boggling. Also, reason #255 not to believe dieticians.

Webcomics round-up:

Friday's Megatokyo is an exercise in hilarity. Not just mild amusement, but full-blown, full-page comedy. And that's great.

El Goonish Shive gets a severe case of plot twist.

In Sluggy Freelance...
...
Darn! Why didn't I figure that out earlier!

I was happy to see Star Cross'd Destiny start up again. I hate it when stories die away... so much lost potential. Also, no ending. A start and no end - that's like someone disappearing and you don't ever find out what happened. No closure.
Anyway, SXD started up again, and we're finally back to where we left off. It should be interesting to see how this plays out.

Till next time.

Tuesday 18 September 2007

Forms, Forms, Forms

For those still not in the know, I'm winging off to Australia in late February to complete my university education. And you know what that means?

FORMS.

Course applications. Housing applications. Tuition grant deferment applications. Visa applications. Application applications. Address, full name, various telephone numbers ten times over. The fields I'm never sure how to answer. The fields I can't answer because I lack the necessary information. And I'm supposed to believe that some day, somehow, all these forms will be complete?

That's a lot of faith there.

I wish I had the ability to fast-forward past these weeks of anxiety to the point of time when everything will be nicely wrapped up. Then again, if I were cheating I might as well fast-forward to when I'm dead. There isn't much point to life if you don't live it.

Anyway! School restarted yesterday, with the same class as last semester. I was hoping we'd finally get a classroom with windows facing outside... no such luck. The only advantage, as far as I can see, is that we have a clear view of the lift lobby, and can keep tabs on everyone arriving at our floor.

Speaking of lifts, the lift logic in this block is worse than ever. I'm on the sixth floor, and all lifts already at the seventh or fifth floors refuse to respond. It's always the first-floor lifts which take the call. Always.

Stupid lifts.

But our classroom is otherwise quite nice - it's a new room, opened up only this semester for our use. Thus the carpet is pristine, the walls are pure white and the chair cushions are springy. Also, they lack curry stains. And... other stains. Um, right.

The best news, though, has to be that the last experiment for my Final Year Project is scheduled for tomorrow. Once that's done there'll be one whole ton of stress off my shoulders. Ahh, freedom. I can almost taste it.

...Enough of that. For now, a roundup of some of the more interesting recent webcomic updates:

  • In Something Positive, Davan once again proves he's the master of the witty comeback.
  • Sluggy Freelance gets out of draggy mode with a plot twist. (Phase 2? Perhaps!) Also, Riff's shoulder angels continue to amuse, even while highlighting that a notion of right or wrong depends on perspective.
  • Exterminatus Now is, for the first time, serious.
    And it's still funny.
  • The latest Lil Formers strip makes me wonder what sort of person would want to lick a robot in the first place. Do they even have a flavour?
  • In No Need for Bushido, Yori shows that he can be competent, not just by hurting Ryoku but also by successfully applying Cho's advice. Good on him!
And finally, a random fact of the day: I dislike bananas, but love banana cake.

Till next time.

Saturday 15 September 2007

Bang and Bounce

On the subject of time-wasting, IndestructoTank! is one of the more unusual of such games out there. The premise is simple: you, the player, control an indestructable tank. Your aim is to destroy as many enemies as possible by ramming into them and gain experience points; you must obtain a certain amount of experience points before your steadily-decreasing fuel runs out. Fail, and the tank blows up. (Not so indestructable after all.) There are five enemies encountered in the game, all with varying point values, weapons and movement speeds.

The game has several unique features. One is the controls; the player can only move the tank left or right, using either keyboard arrow keys or a Wiimote. In order to launch the tank upwards, the tank must run into either an enemy missile or the enemy itself, creating a blast which propels the tank into the air. It is possible to perpetually keep the tank in the air, "juggling" from enemy to enemy, though points are obtained only if the tank lands on the ground.

Another feature is the "store" concept, where players can spend points accumulated during the game. The difference here is instead of purchasing weapons or upgrades, the points are used to buy enemies. That's right - you spend points to ensure that the next level will have more enemies for you to blow up in new and interesting combinations. (As a matter of fact, winning the game requires buying out the maximum possible frequency of all five enemies.) The strategy element comes from deciding what enemies to increase in number. The standard slow-firing Bomber? The aptly-named Bouncer with the rebounding missiles? Or perhaps the Miner, which can only travel on the ground? All enemy types have their own advantages and annoyances, and picking the right mix of enemies is necessary in order to clear each successive level.

Special features aside, even the more conventional aspects of the game do not disappoint. The graphics, while not overwhelmingly eye-catching, are actually fairly complex, and allow various enemies and missiles to be distinguised from each other at a glance. The mountainous backdrop is sufficiently varied, using fluctuating mountain heights and cloud patterns to avoid monotony. There is only one music track for all the levels, but it is suitably low-key and does not detract from the action.

Something I've noticed with many independantly-created timewasters is that they have great graphics, a great premise, superb graphics... and terrible game physics. IndestructoTank! suffers from no such problems. The movements of the tank are fluid, responding easily to the controls, and act in a reasonably realistic manner. Even slight control manipulations can make a big difference, allowing for precise actions in-game.

One of the few drawbacks of the game is that every time it is loaded afresh, the player must go through a forced tutorial. While commendable in getting new players to understand what they are playing before they try it out, it gets annoying for repeat players.

Also, the high scores lists don't work anymore thanks to some hackers, curse them.

Nevertheless, this is a great timewaster, perfect for those moments when you have lots of work to do and don't want to get on it just then. Simple, addictive and with just a little thinking required - one of the best games of its genre.

Thursday 13 September 2007

Time Wastage

So it occurs to me that I'm spectacularly good at wasting time - or whiling it away, as the occasion calls for it.

Take the last few days. I've been coming in at seven-thirty in the morning to do labwork and finishing up at around two in the afternoon. (The actual duration of course varies with the nature of the work, the available manpower and the number of mistakes made by said manpower.) My ride home is at five in the afternoon. For anyone with a rudimentary grasp of arithmetic or calculator usage, that means three hours of spare time in school and away from chocolate supplies, art materials and other home conveniences.

What is to be done then, with this spare time? These are the possible options:

1) Finish up daily lab reports.
2) Go to the library and read a book.
3) Pig out at one of the canteens.
4) Do stuff on the internet.

The first takes an hour on the outside, leaving two more as spares. The second is a poor option because I make it a point to avoid non-fiction books as much as possible (they trigger flashbacks of the last few weeks before the O' Levels) and I haven't been able to find the fiction section in our school library. The third is a ridiculous exercise in wasting health and money. Therefore the last is usually what I resort to.

And considering that I can eat up two hours effortlessly simply by surfing the internet, I think we may have a serious problem.

It's not that there's actually that much to see. Although the internet is a very large place, hardly 0.01% of it is likely to fall into my range of interests at all, and when we factor in the fact that I actually have to be aware of a site of interest in order to visit it, the number of websites available for two hours of browsing drops significantly. Adjust for sites which are rarely updated, sites which I've decided to boycott and moods wherein I simply don't feel like visiting a certain page, and the number drops further.

The internet does, however, provide numerous ways of amplifying the time spent on a single site. Wikipedia, for instance, has a link at every other word, and so a single keyword could lead to twenty pages browsed in a single sitting. Archives are another trap - be it comic archives or Something Awful's index of Photoshop Phriday topics, they provide a library of multiple instances of certain media the internet user might enjoy, even if these archives have been perused multiple times. And of course mindless online games are a well-known draw into repeating one set of actions over and over again for an imaginary reward.

But perhaps the most insidious of time-wasting sites are those which require input from the user, particularly thoughtful input, because as we all know thinking takes time when carried out properly and sometimes even when it's not. Blogs are a prime example of this, and...

...Dammit.

Thursday 6 September 2007

Pavarotti Dies at 71

CNN.com link

Sleep well, Senor Pavarotti. We will never forget you.

Friday 31 August 2007

Update XI: Too Much to Do

That sums out my situation right now. Final Year Project concerns have all but pushed aside everything else, including that art contest entry I really ought to be working on.

Perhaps then it's fortunate that I finished Transformers: The Game before all this stuff came falling down. In spite of the poor reviews, I found myself enjoying the game thoroughly (probably because it incorporates two of my passions - treasure-hunting and driving). Although the controls, particularly of the camera, were rather iffy, I discovered that there are a surprising number of special moves. For instance, Blackout performs a powerful type of ground attack if you hit the melee attack button immediately after dropping from guard mode, Barricade can switch on his police lights causing other cars to move faster and out of the way, and in Hoover Dam there's a way to make Bumblebee flip up to the first level of the generator towers...

Even with the regular controls, it's all good fun. I might try playing it all over again just for the sake of doing it all better the second time. Not to mention searching for more tricks.

In other news, the Gmail collaborative video is out! Watch it here. It's quite funny, and reflects not only the efforts of those who submitted videos, but also the editors who managed to string them together coherently.

On the home front, I can't say this surprises me. Particularly in primary school, I met several teachers who were so obsessed with rules they forgot why those rules were implemented in the first place. Of course their attitude only got them hated by their charges, and earned them absolutely no respect.

There are just so many problems in education, not just at home but worldwide. Sometimes I think of becoming a teacher for the sake of making a difference, and then I stop and wonder if it ever would.

Sunday 26 August 2007

Fiction: The Old Guard

It occurred to me suddenly that I missed them.

It was in the middle of the afternoon with the sunlight coming in and twinkling off the glasses, and the tavern was quiet because no one came in at that time. I was in my corner with a pile of wanted posters on the table and a newspaper for company, and as the old barkeep Jen came around with a white dishcloth he said, “Ain’t seen Tabby in a while. What happen’d ter him?”

He was falling and I thrust out my hand but it missed his by inches and he fell and fell I tried to scream but it was no good and he was smiling, he was smiling, he held up nine fingers and as I stared the darkness swallowed him up I couldn’t save him I couldn’t save him not dear lucky Tabby no –

“I don't know,” I said, and sipped at my coffee.

“I remember how it were like,” mused Jen, absently polishing the tabletop. “It were grand times, it were. Angel an’ Rosemarie, and that there bard chap –”

“Fugue,” I supplied distractedly.

“Aye, that were his name. Good lad, always a-ready with a yarn. Prob’ly a chronicler fer one o’ them grand houses in Pichon now, I shoun’t wonder.”

“Or rotting away in Menksvale Prison,” I muttered under my breath.

“Now wouldn’t that be nice?” Jen rambled on, noticing nothing. “An’ Meerschaum. Har, now that one had a laugh. Did us all good, hearin’ it boomin’ up ter the rafters.”

He went like that too. He was laughing, a horrible sound as he swung his daggers in a deadly crossing arc, the carcasses forming a putrid stockade about him but never strong enough to protect him. They just kept coming and he knew he’d never survive, gruesome purplish blood splattering across his fair skin and his fine clothes, and by the time his own was let we were well out of sight and knew we’d lost him –

“Yes,” I said shortly. “It did.”

“They were good times, lad.” Jen, eyes far away, automatically wiped the ashtray with his towel, sending deep black streaks into the white cloth. He would get it from his wife later for that one. “We were all so happy. An’ now yer’ the onley one still here.”

I saw Angel at the executions the other day. He did not pull down his hood so much as he had in the old days, so I recognised him easily. He still disguised his arbalest in the form of a bulky staff though. His eyes flicked into mine briefly, blue-green and haunted, and then he pulled away with the crowd. I could not even smile at him –

“Yes.”

“An’ we be grateful,” said a new voice. Hanna came from the back, wiping her hands on her apron. “Folks as likes ter forget their heroes, but we never do. Yer’ll always be welcome here.”

“Thank you,” I said, sincerely. I might have been aloof, but I was not incapable of gratitude. Hanna huffed, a little embarrassed, and looked for something familiar. “Jen! What yer be doin’ with me best dishcloth?”

Jen almost dropped the ashtray. “Um...” he fumbled.

I rose, rolling up the posters and tucking them under one arm along with the newspaper. “I have to go.” The barkeep and his wife immediately turned from their impending argument to detain me, but I spoke before they could. “I have something to take care of.”

They understood of course. They were good, sympathetic souls, for all their village roughness. Hanna pressed a warm paper parcel into my hand, and Jen accompanied his insistence that I would always be welcome with a hearty clap on the back. I nodded to them both and stalked off down the street.

It was a good walk up the hill, and the sun was sending golden threads through the trees as I reached my destination. The small white stone was almost overrun with flowering creeper, so much so it was almost invisible, but I found it easily enough. I had always been able to.

I carefully sat down next to it on the grass and stared out, looking over the town and the dying sun beyond it. It was a quiet evening, still and peaceful. Away across the hills, a nightingale began to sing.

Presently I spoke. “I should have listened to you. We all should. I wish... I could tell you that.”

The stone sat unmoving, unable to forgive.

“That’s what you hated, wasn’t it? Not about what you could see. It was that no one else could. You were sighted in the land of the blind, and none of us understood what you meant. Not until the end.”

I leant back into the grass. “You know, I never cared much for the company,” I mused. “Everyone was just there. I thought I could have done without them. I thought I was there from pure courtesy. But then we started to drop away, one by one, and I realised how much more I could have given back then. Back when it wasn’t too late. Back when we were... whole, I suppose.”

The golden rays had now deepened to orange, and they coloured the sky in brilliant streaks. The grass rustled in acknowledgement of the light breeze.

“I miss those days.” I stood up suddenly. “But things must change, or they never will. Goodbye, Rosemarie.” I touched the top of the stone lightly, then turned and walked, away from the town, towards the darkening hills.

As I tread the narrow rocky paths, eating the warm bacon-and-egg pastry Hanna had packed for me, I thought about the days before the change. About the decisions I could never rewrite. They were sombre thoughts, but not discouraging.

“After all,” I contemplated, “Someday I will be old and toothless, or perhaps freezing in some cave somewhere, or alone without hope in a graveyard. And then I will look upon these days as the best in my life.”

The thought made me chuckle.

Fin.

Monday 20 August 2007

Fly Away

A close friend is flying away to parts unknown today. (Well, not so much unknown as foreign, but you get the point.) It's the first time one of our little circle is going to be so far away.

...

I don't know. I deal with this kind of stuff better by not thinking about it.

Good luck, girl. Don't ever turn back. We'll be behind you all the way.

Sunday 19 August 2007

Thursday 9 August 2007

1-Up to Singapore!

Singapore turned 42 today. Now we all know 42 is a very special number, so Happy Awesomely-Numbered Birthday, Singapore!

This year's National Day Parade was held at Marina Bay, owing to the (frankly dinosaurian) National Stadium undergoing a major overhaul. The show was held aboard a floating platform, with some performances spilling out onto the water and air around the platform, and it was all very, very awesome. Check out the highlights:

1) The President, for the first time, inspected all the contigents, and from a vehicle instead of on foot.

2) A Chinook helicopter hovered three metres above the sea surface, kicking up water through the action of its rotors and releasing divers into the water. These divers were later picked up by rigid-hull inflatable boats, which performed some impressive turns of their own. That's not the point though. The point is - three metres above the water! Dude!

2) The SCDF's fire-attack vehicles - I think that's what they were called - rolled in in front of the audience and sprayed them with water. They do that every year, but it never gets old.

4) The new Apache helicopters performed some impressive aerial stunts, swooping in around the buildings and towards the audience, before coming to a dead stop in mid-air, tilting in a salute and flying off. I wish I had that on tape, because it was truly awesome to behold.

5) The show segment was much as always - a lame theme with impressive performances which make you forgive them for it. This year's performance was slightly different, in that there was one central character - a lionfish-type person named Sing - who rollerbladed in and out of each of the fifteen segments, occasionally making some statement about people, home and the elements.

6) Some singer - I didn't catch his name - rolled into the platform in a white car and put in an energetic performance. He was dressed in an obvious parody of the famous Sir Stamford Raffles statue standing by the Singapore River.

7) One performance was entirely by forty-two neon-decorated kites. That's right, kites. It was delicate and magnificent all at once.

8) There were two theme songs this year. I didn't like the first one - too much putting-down of other countries' landmarks - but the second, Will You, was nice.

Will you make this island
Amazing in all ways
Suprises every corner
Delightful nights and days


Will you take this country
And turn it from a place
To a home that greets you
With smiles on every face


Will you come on this brave journey
Will you help to make it real
Will you write us grand new stories
Songs that everyone will feel


So will you swim the current
Will you scale new heights
Will you make it happen
Will you let your dreams take flight


And will you make the difference
Will you seize the day
Will you live each moment
Will you dare to find new ways


Will you take this city
And turn it from a place
To a home that greets you
With smiles on every face


Will you come on this brave journey
Will you help to make it real
Will you write us grand new stories
Songs that everyone will feel


So will you swim the current
Will you scale new heights
Will you make it happen
Will you let your dreams take flight


And will you make the difference
Will you seize the day
Will you live each moment
Will you dare to find new ways


Dare to find...
Dare to find...
Dare to find...
New ways


(Music and lyrics by Jimmy Ye. Watch the music video here.)

9) The finale was the most colourful, glittering, firework-filled thing I've ever seen. But of course nothing felt greater than singing the national anthem with the rest of the country.

It's an odd thing, this Parade. Somehow, for a few hours, everyone on the island is united in one grand show of patriotism. And this one's not yet another artificial attempt at building a national identity. The nation truly celebrates, as one.

Here's to forty-two great years from my favourite country, and here's to many more in the same spirit.

Saturday 4 August 2007

Update X: Ten, I'm Telling You!

Been too long, eh?

1) I absolutely hate critics who don't know what they are talking about.

2) Turns out that knowing how to do something and actually doing it are two entirely different things.

3) Some people never understand instructions unless they are pasted in a visible place in 72-point font and incorporate generous amounts of profanity in the sentence structure.

4) Scaring people is easier when they aren't paying attention.

5) The best-laid schemes o' mice an' men gang aft agley. Especially when they depend on the cooperation of other mice and men (see #3).

6) BZP's forums have been down for over a week now. I hope it doesn't last.

7) The current Sluggy arc ends with a difficult choice and a generous dose of ion cannon.

8) Pirate is in a dilemma.

9) The Gmail crew pulls more funny stuff. I thought this was one of the better submissions, and this one's wonderfully animated. Also, Lego!
This one is just cute.

10) I hate shoes which are not sneakers. Actually, I pretty much hate any shoe which has a bad effect on my feet.
I refuse to endure damage to my feet for the sake of aethetics.

11) This post had a lot of junk code, so I HTML'd it to death.

12) I'm Ratchet, apparently.

And my cursor is acting up. I'm off.

Sunday 15 July 2007

I Didn't See This Coming

UPDATE: Brickshelf is staying.

Update: Brickshelf is going to be temporarily up until July 31st. Go get your stuff now!

So... Brickshelf is down. Or, to be precise, has "discontinued operation." No reason has been given.

To be honest, I haven't used Brickshelf in a while. After one whole folder randomly got deleted, and after experiencing one site problem too many, I turned to its sister site, Maj, and have used it ever since. Maj generally runs smoother, and is also not restricted to Bionicle content, which probably explains its popularity.

But even for those who switched to Maj, many still kept galleries of art, MOC photographs and other graphical content on their Brickshelf accounts, as leftovers from the days when Brickshelf was the site for Bionicle-related image hosting. Not all of these were backed up on hard drives. Some of them were irreplaceable digital images which could never be re-scanned or re-photographed.

So... now Brickshelf has discontinued operations, whatever that means for its account-holders. If it means that all that was in there is now permanently gone, this is going to be a terrible day for many.

We'll have to wait and see how this plays out over the next few days.

Friday 6 July 2007

Concerning Genius

"Sometimes men come by the name of genius in the same way that certain insects come by the name of centipede — not because they have a hundred feet, but because most people can't count above fourteen. " - Georg Christoph Lichtenberg

There are many words to describe people like Lichtenberg. None of them are polite.

But they are always spoken in a tone of admiration.

Tuesday 3 July 2007

Update IX: Crunch Time

A lot of things are suddenly coming together for these few weeks - well, pretty much until August, so I probably won't be around for a while. For now, some quick updates:

- Yesterday Star Movies was showing Jurassic Park, so I watched the first part just for the heck of it.
The verdict? Even after fourteen years, the movie still is great. In an age where Bill Nighy looks like he was born with tentacles on his face, the dinosaurs remain as visually convincing as ever

- The Transformers movie was well-received by my classmates, even those who didn't originally know that Transformers can morph into vehicles. Or anything else about them, for that matter.
One friend has a crush on Optimus Prime. Or maybe just his eyes. It's a little difficult to tell.

- I think I broke my PowerPoint. It's running slower than before.

- History is important and should not be erased. That includes the awful art which was all you were capable of three years ago.
... I'll never get why so many webcomic artists feel the need to reboot their work. Wait a couple of years and they'll be even better - and then what? Another reboot?

- As usual, xkcd totally gets it.

- I wish people would stop IM-ing me nonsense in the middle of class.

- Even though I have an entire category dedicated to Bionicle, there are only three entries in it. This must change.

- I need sleep.

Friday 29 June 2007

Man Bites Dog

No, not really, but I was reminded of that old adage about news when I came across this article.

Dog Performs Heimlich Maneuver on Owner

Neat, eh?

Wednesday 27 June 2007

Picture-Perfect

If Adobe Photoshop is the most popular digital art program for artists, MSPaint is the choice of rebel artists.

Check out this PSP, and then this rendition of the Mona Lisa.

There is a lesson here. It is that the expensive tool isn't what counts. What does count is the ability to use it, and the will to try.

All hail the lousy tools, which force us to gain true skill.

Sunday 24 June 2007

Update VIII: Randomness

As if all the updates weren't random. Anyway, I've taken a short break off my PowerPoint monster to live a little and do some blog updating.

There are currently only two words in the English Language which end in "gry" (unless you count some pretty archaic words which hardly anyone has heard of). It's pretty typical that some have made a joke out of it.

Sandwich-makers are probably one of the greatest inventions ever (next to the microwave oven). If I can, I bring one along with me when/if I go overseas next year.

On Friday, Sluggy Freelance had the most awesome plot twist since the Blacksoul = Obsidian Teknokon = Bun Bun revelation. The speccers are already buzzing, and I can't wait to see how this plays out.
Also, Torg does something smart. It's always great when he does that.

And... I'm off to slay some more of the monster.

Tuesday 12 June 2007

Update VII: A Question of Weight

While looking for something entirely unrelated, I came across this.

Okay, this is ridiculous. I've never got why so many women feel compelled to lie about their weight, or age, or "vital statistics", or whatever. But when it gets to the point where such lying interferes with medical research...

To be fair, when conducting a telephone survey on something which people typically lie about, you would have to expect some nasty inaccuracies.

But it's still ridiculous. What is so important about maintaining an illusion to others that you are lighter than you seem? Your weight isn't going to magically change just because you say it is something else. And when that weight is a possible indication of serious health problems, lying about it moves from silliness to suicide.

Let's change this, one woman at a time. I weigh 64 kilograms (that's 141 pounds for you imperialists). I'm the heaviest person in my family. Thanks to the "spare tyres" around my waist, I have a fairly unattractive figure. I could improve it but I'm too lazy to exercise. So there.

Since this is an update, I'm supposed to talk about other random things. Let's see... I finally rounded up my Final Year Project report and logbook; I'm happy with them and I'm going to submit them tomorrow. (Incidentally, since it's the holidays now, and since I have no other business in school, I have to travel all the way up North to Woodlands just to hand in my stuff. Sometimes teachers can be really... insensitive.)

And since I'm temporarily free from actual work, I've gone on to comic-drawing. The current project is a PowerPoint monster and it is going to kill me.

Of course, half the fun is defeating the monster.


I'm not sure if anyone's noticed, but I tweaked a few things here and there around the blog. There are also some exciting new links up:

Pirate and Alien: One of those "innocent comics" which I'm apparently fond of. I adore the quirky art style, and it's so, so funny.

USS Constitution Virtual Tour: I actually wanted to put this up long ago, but the link wasn't working then. The site has detailed diagrams and photographs of the famed Old Ironsides, the oldest frigate still in service. I use this every time I need to design or draw a ship.

Quick After-Battle Triple Chocolate Cake: If there's a method to kill people with excessive chocolate, this has to be it.
I am so making this someday.

Chalk: An artistic take on the traditional shoot-em-up. Highly addictive.
(I might review this later. I find reviews are the best way to corrupt my friends.)


In completely unrelated news... there is no completely unrelated news.

Saturday 9 June 2007

Meme: Marriage Age

I got tagged with this meme by Noel - put an X next to the items in the list which apply to you, tot up the frequency of Xs and that's the age that you'll get married. (What do you do if the total is 3 or something? Wait, don't answer that.) So let's see how this turns out...

[X] I know how to make a pot of coffee. (I can make my father's coffee. That's even harder!)
[X] I keep track of dates using a calendar. (...There's something else you can use?)
[ ] I own more than one credit card. (Ha! No.)
[ ] I know how to change the oil in a car. (Not with confidence, no.)
[X] I know how to do my own laundry. (Every Wednesday and Sunday, baby!)
[ ] I vote every election. (Not 21 yet, sorry.)
[X] I can cook for myself. (Definitely! Now, about cooking for others...)
[ ] I think politics are exciting. (Bleh. No.)
[ ] I balance my checkbook. (Don't have one, silly.)
[X] My parents have better things to say than my friends. ('Fraid they do. Age, wisdom, etc.)
Total: 5

[X] I show up for school/college/work every day early. (Touch wood!)
[X] I always carry a pen in my pocket/purse. (And scissors, and a pencil, and a ruler, and...)
[X] I've never gotten a detention. (Clean record here.)
[X] I have never smoked a cigarette. (Ew, no.)
[X] I have never gotten completely trashed. (Never drunk enough to.)
[ ] I have forgotten my own birthday at least once. (Bwahaha! No.)
[X] I like to take walks by myself. (Yeah... I miss Phoenix Park.)
[X] I've watched talk shows. (Never enjoyed them though.)
[X] I know what 'credibility' means without looking it up. (Ha! Yes.)
[ ] I drink coffee at least once a week. (No. Caffeine makes me drunk, remember?)
Total: 8

[X] I know how to do the dishes. (We don't have a dishwasher.)
[X] I can count to 10 in another language. (Two languages, actually.)
[X] When I say I'm going to do something I do it. (Even if I take a million years over it.)
[X] My parents trust me. (Thankfully.)
[ ] I can mow the lawn. (What lawn?)
[X] I can make adults laugh without being stupid. (Can do.)
[X] I remember to water the plants. (That doesn't mean they grow well...)
[X] I study when I have to. (And even when I don't.)
[X] I pay attention at school/college. (In RP, if you don't you're dead.)
[ ] I remember to feed my pets. (What pets?)
Total: 8

[X] I can spell 'experience' without looking it up. ('Cause it's right in front of me. :P Nah, I can. Really. It's "separation" I have a problem with.)
[ ] I work out on a regular basis. (Nah. I'm a slob.)
[X] I clean up my own mess. (Yes. Yes I do.)
[ ] The people at Starbucks know me by name. (No. Caffeine. Can't drink.)
[ ] My favorite kind of food is take out. (Hard call, but no.)
[X] I have gained weight since middle/high school. (2 kg. Nothing too bad.)
[ ] The first thing I do when I wake up is get caffeine. (CANNOT. TAKE. CAFFEINE.)
[X] I can go to the store without getting something I don't need. (Strangely, yes.)
[X] I understand political jokes the first time they are said. (Yeah... doesn't mean I enjoy them.)
[X] I can type quickly. (Sure.)
Total: 6

[ ] I have realized that the weather forecast changes every hour. (Considering I don't believe it anyway, I've never had a reason to know the frequency of forecast updates.)
[ ] My only friends are from my place of employment. (No.)
[ ] I have been to a Tupperware party. (A what?)
[ ] I have realized that no one will take you seriously unless you are over the age of 25 and have a job. (Lies. People take me seriously all the time.)
[ ] I have more bills than I can pay. (Nope.)
[ ] All (most) of my friends are older than I am. (Nope.)
[X] I can say no to staying out all night. (I've never stayed out all night.)
[X] I use the Internet every day. (Guilty as charged! Well, almost every day. There was that time Macx conked out...)
[ ] My wardrobe hasn't changed in a while. (I just stole a belt from my mother.)
[X] I can read a book and actually finish it. (You mean... I'm not supposed to? But...but...)
Total: 3

Grand Total: 30 years
(And that was without a single drop of -I mean, a calculator. Yeah, calculator.)

So... If you are responsible, dedicated to your work, a credit to your parents, politically aware, careful of your health, lax when it comes to paying bills and completely obsessed with caffeine, you'll marry later.

Man, that's depressing. I'm going to go mow someone else's lawn and get drunk on coffee.

...Three posts in a row referencing a Jack Sparrow quote! I'm on a roll!

Friday 8 June 2007

Misguided Good

Today's Order of the Stick... No, you know what? This calls for a quote.

"...a dishonest man you can always trust to be dishonest. Honestly. It's the honest ones you want to watch out for, because you can never predict when they're going to do something incredibly... stupid."

Gaaah! Miko!

I want to feel sorry for her, I really do. But it's hard to feel sorry for someone who can't snap out of her own little world and realise that she is, in actual fact, not always right. Even though her action was bad more through timing that actual evilness, there's a fairly high probability that she would never understand how bad smashing that sapphire was even if it was pointed out to her. She hasn't even got that redeeming feature. Plus from what we've seen so far, it's not even certain that her reasons for breaking the sapphire were sound in the first place.

I suppose then that I'm angry at her not for her mistake, but because she'd probably do it again if given a chance, without so much as thinking it through.

Anyway, Burlew gets kudos for creating such compelling panels. If you think about it, the outcome was predictable (honestly, if the bad guys died that would be the end of the comic), but by triggering this predictable outcome through a set of infuriating events, he involved readers in the story and made them feel genuine emotion at the result.

And that's brilliant.

To change the subject completely, the current Dominic Deegan storyline, while somewhat contrived at points, remains whole-hearted and charming. After the heavily-emotional storylines preceding this one, the light-heartedness is rather a relief.

But I'd really like to know if Dominic is being genuinely pleasant, or whether he foresaw the whole thing.

Monday 4 June 2007

The World's Most Reputable Company

Congratulations to LEGO!

That's actually very impressive, considering all those complaints about Cordak blasters and guns and whatnot, and considering that the survey ranked a total of 600 companies worldwide. This result shows that, in spite of all the griping, people still trust the makers of the old reliable studded brick. It's also great because, well, I wouldn't know what to do if Lego had been placed at the bottom. Sort of like finding out that a childhood hero was really rotten to the core.

Anyway, well done Lego, and thanks for giving me a better reason to waste more money on your stuff. :P

Also, congratulations are in order to IKEA (#2), Toyota (#6) and Ferrero (#7), other familiar companies (to me, at least) which made it to the top ten. The full rankings are available here.

On a completely unrelated note (it was Ferrero Rocher which put me in mind of it), what on earth does Pizzaro have to do with pie?

Just a Thought

Why do Robitussin lozenges come in packs of nine?

Sunday 3 June 2007

Worst. Bluebeard. Ever.

[Warning: The following link leads to a site with some mildly mature language.]

Superman has a locked room which he warned Lois never to enter! What deadly secret could possibly be inside? Gasp!
... To their credit, that was an entirely unexpected outcome.

In other news, Spiderman battles illiteracy.

Sunday 27 May 2007

19

Got a 1-Up two days ago. (Not today, dear friends.) Though most of the fun was yesterday, with the movie and whatnot. Friends make everything fun.

Oh and about At World's End? Don't listen to people who say it had a bad ending. The ending was perfect, because it reassures us that Jack will always be the same, free-spirited soul who's perpetually two steps ahead of everyone else, while simultaneously avoiding a complete and unrealistic happy ending. (Face it, life's tough.) Incidentally, if you ever do go and watch it, wait until the credits are over before leaving. There's an after-credits scene which is fairly important, plot-wise.

On another note, there are some people out there who have apparently forgotten how to have fun in an attempt to be "mature" or "superior" or whatever the elitists call it these days. I sincerely pity them.

Here's to eternal childishness and a love of the sillier things.

Saturday 19 May 2007

What She Said

From the Thursday edition of The Amazing Super Zeroes:


"Well, ever since we got upgrades in our powers, I've been getting these splitting headaches. I only just realized that this was due to me hearing thousands of voices at once."

"For whatever reason, they seem to have subsided, though I doubt it will last for long. Also, Emo is making a lot of noise and it reverberates throughout the entire building. What's up with that? It seems like he never leaves the training room, he just stays in there, blowing up just when I start to go to sleep. Is he in trouble? And I saw Rosetta on the way down... what is up with her new outfit? It's a bit skanky."


"Is Kid around? Somehow, he seems to be able to understand me. Maybe he could translate all this."


Huh. No way, Allie.

Tuesday 15 May 2007

Update VI: My Favourite Number is Six

At least, it used to be. You know, back when favourite numbers were important. Nowadays I keep it only through tradition.

I had coffee yesterday - Ice-Blended Mocha from the Café Galilee in the school library - for what will be the last time. Within minutes I had developed symptoms alarmingly close to drunkenness, and felt twitchy all the way until bedtime. This is the second time in a month coffee has caused me to act strangely (the last time it was a can of Nescafé), so I'm officially swearing off the beverage from now on.

The Deegans amuse yet again, with Mrs. Deegan demonstrating that, in spite of her powerful magical abilities and influential post as a school headmistress, she is and always will be a mother. "What have I told you about fights with strange visions?"

My Final Year Project report submission deadline was pushed back today - just when I'd finished it. So all those sacrificed weekends and not posting on BAG and deciding not to take part in the RP comic-strip competition was all to naught.

AAAARGH!

I'm alright now.

Monday 14 May 2007

To the Invisible People

Dear lurkers,

Please do not act surprised. Of course I know you are there. The distinct scent of invisibility, the winds which shift when there are none to shift them, the inexplicable increases in my profile views - could there be any doubt? But then I am a lurker too, and I understand your ways.

Therefore I dedicate this, my 50th blog post, to you the invisible people, the silent supporters inhabiting the fringes of society. You may be reserved in speech and restrained in action, but it is your quiet approval which suppresses conflict ere it has a chance to begin. It is an important and unfulfilling role you play, and for this I salute you.

Now that's over with... Ditch those shadows already! The world can't talk to you if it doesn't know you exist!

Regards,
Sharkie

Sunday 13 May 2007

Past and Gone

I looked at the bottom of the main forum page at BZP today. So many members turning seventeen. I turned seventeen on the boards two years ago. They would have been fifteen then.

I feel... old.

Goodbye, pillar of the old guard. It won't be the same without you.

Saturday 12 May 2007

Escape the White Chamber

I'd first like to say that the opening date of At World's End is a clear sign from the powers that be that I should buy tickets to watch it, as opposed to waiting for it to come to Star Movies.

My classmates introduced me to the brilliant White Chamber, a point-and-click puzzle game in which you must escape an isolated chamber McGyver-style, using whatever items that may have been carelessly left in the room. Whoever set up the White Chamber must have been particularly careless, because among other things the player can find a crowbar, a mysterious remote control, a manual (with pictures!) and a Yamaha motorcycle.

Part of the challenge with the game is learning the rules. In a real situation if someone were locked in such a room, their first action would be to pick up the table and pitch it through the garage window. Naturally, that is not an option here, and certain items can only interact with each other in certain ways and under certain conditions. The game also contains an element of the supernatural (or perhaps really advanced technology), so there really isn't any way to define what is possible or impossible.

That is not to say that there is no help for the player. Other than the opening scene, the game is marked by almost complete silence, broken only by sounds triggered by certain actions and snatches of an eerie tune which plays only when an important item is present in the scene. Once an item is in the inventory, it can be examined for a short sentence describing it; examining certain areas in the room will also trigger the display of messages, supposedly from the player talking to themselves, which serve as useful hints.

The creator of White Chamber, Toshimitsu Takagi, also created a number of other rooms, including the original Crimson Room, the creepy, grostly Viridian Room, and the simplistic - but no less challenging - Blue Chamber. However, in spite of being the most recent, White Chamber is possibly the easiest - the items which can be picked up interact in the most predictable ways, and there are no items hidden in obscure, hard-to-reach locations as in the Crimson Room. The greatest challenge is in learning how to perform certain actions, but once this is achieved it is merely a matter of putting things together. Perhaps this is what makes this game more successful as a logic puzzle - there is less emphasis on blind luck, and more on thinking things through.

As a whole it's a great game, especially for the puzzle-minded. I'd recommend it to anyone with a few free days to burn - and you'll need those few days, because once you're immersed in the White Chamber, its mysteries will haunt you until you figure the way out.

White Chamber requires the latest version of Adobe Flash Player to run. Get it here.

Wednesday 9 May 2007

Update V: Amazing Days

The first "Bionicle Going Downhill" topic which was about the exact opposite.

Absent friends have returned. Here's to their health and happiness.

If "schizont" wasn't so malarial, it would be the most aristocratic word on the planet. Say it now - notice the automatic superior tone when you pronounce the -zont?

Unless of course you're mispronouncing it as "sigont" or "sheejoint," in which case you're entirely missing out on the class. You wouldn't believe the sort of pronunciations my friends come up with. I'd understand with something like trypanosomiases or Plasmodium falciparum, but when we have "yield" turning into "yat"... And how about that classmate whose best rendition of my name was "Primus?"

For the record, my name is not Primus.

Tuesday 8 May 2007

Magic Bread!

If I was there, I'm sorry to say I'd laugh too. Poor Saehral.

I wonder how elves live, if all that looks like "magicks". Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic (Clarke's Third Law), but that implies that one side is relatively lower on the technology tree.

Sunday 29 April 2007

Update IV: It's a Lazy Sunday Afternoon

The spam situation has gotten better. This is all I got today.

How cute!

We're rolling into May, which is going to be a busy month for me. I'll be happy when it's all over and we get to June (and holidays - and Final Year Project Part II.)

My drawing spree has come to end, but I was thinking of setting a personal challenge. Set a theme, and draw something related to that theme every week. Of course, I can only get into that after I'm done with the two comic books I'm working on.

Lately I've been browsing the Computer Stupidities website. Not only is it a great location to learn more about computers, but it also warns about the hazards of working in Tech Support.

It's actually amazing how far computers have come. I remember playing Alley Cat on an old Commodore 64 and my brother using Edlin to write a school report (the exclamation mark looked like an ice-cream cone - we thought that was funny), then there was another computer which I can't remember very well except that the logo was green and the name started with "S". The next one was a Aries 386 loaded with Windows 95 and hooked up to our very first inkjet printer and scanner. It was a Pentium in the age where they didn't have to number them, but it was amazing all the same. The games on that machine were - wow. Nothing we had ever seen before. It took us ages to figure out how to play Descent, because we weren't familiar with a 3D game. The scanner was also a revolution of sorts, since we no longer had to vandalise magazines for material for our school scrapbooks, and that printer amazed me. I'd always heard that colour printers were illegal because they could be used to print money, so it looked like a wonderful thing to me.

We also got a new joystick for that machine. It never worked as well as the old one.

Then time went on, the monitor blew up after water dripped onto it, the printer got stuck through disuse, was repaired accidentally by me, and then failed for a last time (I still have a piece of the outer panel and the paper tray), and then we moved to a new house. At about this time, my father got a IBM ThinkPad with a huge mouse which is still cool even now, and as a Pentium III was the most advanced computer we had at the time. I really discovered the Internet on that machine (admittedly dial-up). I played Robohunter 2 and the game would slow every time someone tried to call on the phone.

We kept the computer table (I'm sitting at it now, as it happens), but the CPU eventually failed and had to be replaced. We got a lovely new Compaq Presario where you couldn't jack up the headphones to the speakers (they had to be connected directly to the back of the CPU). This was the age when USBs were becoming popular, and Zip disks had fallen out of favour. And of course, this computer had Windows XP.

Then I came to RP, and got a new laptop, an Acer Travelmate, which was the first computer which really belonged to me. Then it started having errors and hardware failures so much so that I had to use the old IBM as a backup laptop almost constantly, and then died. And now I have this computer, also an Acer, and still going strong. My father has two laptops for work, and when the old Compaq conked out my brother got a nice new Hewlett-Packard PC with a huge flat screen. And that brings us to the present.

The funny thing is, in the early days we had the most advanced computers, thanks to my father's line of work. Now, we're probably among the more conservative when it comes to buying new computers. People have become richer, gadgets have become more affordable, and waves of new jargon have entered the language of the computer-literate. It's no longer about the modest computer on which you have to trim your programs to avoid running out of memory. Now everything is huge. The Commodore 64 had 64 kB of RAM. Fifteen years on and we reach my current computer, with a magnificent 1.0 GB of RAM. It's phenomenal.

... I was supposed to be talking about random stuff in my life, but it appears nostalgia took over the keyboard.