Sorry About the Thumb

... said the server at the fish and chips shop, as he took my ticket number and handed over my food order.

How do they even do that? Note that he had to:
 - Observe, in an instant, the nasty-looking scab on my thumb, complete with a crusting of dried blood
 - Not get grossed-out or drop the fish
 - Comment readily and inoffensively while conveying sympathy

Hospitality school must be gruelling. I'm imaging some sort of commando-style training here.

A McDonald's restaurant, just a few minutes after opening, gleaming and smelling faintly of floor-cleaner. The counter staff wait in their freshly-pressed uniforms, for the first customer of the day.

The door bursts open, or perhaps it would be better to say it shattered open, because a bloodied corpse has just been flung through the glass. It rolls across the floor, smearing the polished tiles, before coming to rest against a chair. A man limps through the broken door, boots crunching the glass, clad in rags which at one time may have been clothing. His face is blackened with soot and dust and motor oil and who knows what else. A rusty old submachine gun is tied to his arm with a blood-spotted bandage, such that his finger can rest on the aged trigger. His free hand is clenched around a bayonet or knife, blade still dripping. He looks around, sniffing in big, noisy breaths. His eyes are yellowed with madness.

Abruptly, he throws his head back and roars. "BIG MAAAAAC!"

One of the counter staff, a pretty blonde, steps up to the cash register and swiftly punches some buttons. "One Big Mac. Any fries or drink for you?"

As implied earlier in this post, the bandages are now off, to allow my injury to complete its healing in the open air. This is a good idea as the majority of the visible damage to my thumb is arguably attributable to the compressive bandaging, and not the V-slicer.

I'm also wondering if I should be concerned that my thumbnail doesn't seem to have grown at all while bandaged.

On an entirely different note, that second-last cake is totally from Coles. Funny how something familiar just jumps at you from a page.