Recipe: Ice Cubes

Ice cubes are essential, especially since the local weather has been so hot lately. This ice cube recipe is pretty much perfect. The only drawback is the 7.5 mg of sodium per serving, so I suggest distilling the tap water first.

(The ratings and reviews are the best part of this "recipe", but the photos come a close second.)

Nostalgia and Embarrassment

I think the reason I don't use Facebook for anything useful (have I even updated it to reflect that I'm not in Melbourne anymore?) is its wider audience. I have written many cringeworthy things both here and in other corners of the Internet, under at least superficial anonymity. A Facebook account is the exact opposite of anonymous.

Sometimes I surprise myself, reading over old missives. My "voice" changes over time, and sometimes it's hard to believe, looking back, that I wrote those words, be they insightful or perfectly moronic. The early ones are the most interesting, back when I was new to blogging, and when I was fairly sure I had no audience, seeing as I hadn't confessed to my friends that I owned a blog.

I notice I had a few traditions, like doing a "New Year" spiel. I seem to have forgotten it this time. Honestly, I have no idea what I was doing on January 1st this year. Probably writing my thesis (it's a safe bet). Frankly, I didn't really have much to reflect on, because by that point it had been a few months of endless THESIS THESIS THESIS.

(Sung to the tune of Badger Badger, probably.)

Anyway, I don't have much to add. Mostly because this is an old post which I forgot to release from my drafts section. Fly away, post. You're free now!

The Other Side

I received two emails and one snail-mail letter from friends in Australia. What a contrast from six years ago! Now I'm in the wrong country, again. Will the grass on the other side never stop being greener?

I'm here now. Such a strange feeling! The end already arrived, days ago, and it landed as a dull thud.

Another Quick Post

It has been too long, yes!

I've been writing my PhD thesis. It seems that there is a critical limit to the amount of writing I can endure in a single day. So, a high thesis output means a low blog output. Even though blogging is significantly less boring.

So! What have I been doing recently? Well... writing I suppose. Where do the days go?

I did spend some time the other day watching the following video multiple times. It's an excellent parody of the video game, the style of music, and the style of music video. Also, it contains the second-most deftly-executed "Your Mom" joke I have seen (the first, of course, is from Meet the Spy).

Canonically, Ratonhnhaké:ton is supposed to be a serious, driven, unquestioned badass. Much of the humour of this video derives from a weedier version of the character engaging in slapstick antics, casual psychopathy, and constant, overwrought, failed attempts at being cool. (George Washington is the opposite - he still appears as a tough, admirable character, just not quite in the way one might expect).

As an aside, I am consistently impressed with level of effort fans expend when making tribute to their favourite media. Regarding the above video, if you take into account the costumes, the actors and actresses, the sets, the props, the stunts, green-screen effects, script writing, lyric writing, sound recording, editing... that's a lot of work for less than four minutes of payoff. Hats off to the Smosh team, and to others like them.

As a further aside, how proud would you be, if you were a creator and someone spent so much time and effort to celebrate your work? Creators who attempt to shut down fansites and delete fanworks on grounds of copyright infringement only confuse me. Copying others' work and trying to take credit for it is unethical, make no mistake, but creating what amounts to a love letter has an entirely different intent behind it.

Leptospira interrogans

After another long absence... Spirochaetes.

Leptospira interrogans is somewhat hard to draw, on account of being helical and having hooked ends. These MSPaint sketches were the result of trying to get a feel for this bacterium's unique topology. (It still isn't quite right - I neglected to include the periplasmic flagella - but we progress.)

Recipe: Cherry Pie

I return after a long time, bearing pie! No photographs, yet again - I literally just finished consuming the last of it, and it didn't occur to me even once that I should gather some pictorial evidence of its existence. No matter, it will be appear again! Sometime.

I brought this pie to work for Pi Day, and it was declared the best of all the baked goods I have prepared so far. In the face of such high praise, who am I to withhold the recipe?

Cherry Pie
Adapted from Cooks Illustrated and various other sources

Ingredients
Crust
2 1/2 cups gluten-free flour blend
1/2 tsp salt
3 tbs raw sugar
225 g unsalted butter, cubed
2 eggs
Ice water

Filling
6 cups halved and pitted cherries (requires about 1 kg fresh cherries)
2 red plums, halved and pitted
1/2 cup raw sugar
Pinch salt
1 tbs freshly-squeezed lemon juice
2 tbs ground instant tapioca
Pinch ground cinnamon
2 tbs (25 g) unsalted butter, cut into 1 cm squares
1 large egg, beaten with 1 tsp water

To make the pie dough, mix flour, salt and sugar with a fork. Add butter; rub into the flour mixture until it resembles breadcrumbs. Stir in eggs. Gradually add a little cold water until the dough comes together; it will be quite crumbly and slightly sticky. Split dough in half; flatten each half into a 10 cm disc. Wrap each disc in cling film and refrigerate for 45 minutes to up to 2 days.

Process plums and 1 cup of the cherries in a blender until smooth, about 1 minute. Strain the purée through a fine mesh strainer into a large bowl, pressing down on with a spoon to extract as much liquid as possible. Discard any leftover solid material. Add remaining 5 cups of cherries, sugar, salt, lemon juice, tapioca and cinnamon. Mix well to combine. Allow to stand for 15 minutes.

Place a baking tray on the lowest rack of the oven; preheat to 205 degrees C. Dust 2 sheets of baking paper with corn starch. Remove one round of dough from the refrigerator and allow to warm slightly; roll out evenly between the sheets of baking paper to about 1/3 cm in thickness. Remove the baking paper and loosely wrap the dough around the rolling pin to lift it. Line a 23 cm pie or tart pan with the dough, leaving a 1-2 cm overhang. 

Fill pie pan with cherry filling. Scatter butter pieces evenly over the filling. Roll out second round of pie dough between 2 well-dusted sheets of baking paper, as before, and place on top of filling. Pinch the pastry edges together into a fluted pattern; trim the excess with a sharp knife or kitchen scissors. 

Brush the top of the pastry evenly with the egg wash. Using a sharp knife, cut 8 evenly-spaced slits in the top crust. Place pie in the freezer for 20 minutes.

Transfer pie onto the preheated baking tray in the oven. Bake at 205 degrees C for 30 minutes, then reduce the oven temperature to 180 degrees C and bake for a further 30-40 minutes, until the crust is golden-brown and the juices are bubbling up. Remove from oven and transfer to a wire rack. Cool to room temperature, about 2-3 hours, until the filling is set. 

Notes

Frozen cherries (about 900 g) can be used instead. If fresh plums are unavailable, use 3-4 canned whole plums.

Gluten-free pastry crumbles easily and is difficult to work with. Plain flour can be used instead, but the crust will not be as flaky. There is a well-recommended pie dough which uses vodka, but I haven't tried it before.

On Growing Up

Apparently, the ultimate adult is calm, rational and intelligent. The Ultimate Adult, we may emphasise, is always right. Not by virtue of knowing everything - no one can - but by being able to admit when they are wrong. Morally right, if you like. The Ultimate Adult does not lose their temper, does not hurt the feelings of others, is never caught out not knowing what to do.

We strive, all our lives, to this ideal. "Grow up!" is a common admonishment. "Childish" is an insult. Our favourite superheroes rescue the helpless - clearly, being one of the helpless is an undesirable state, we would rather be the superhero. 

But, you know, I think part of growing up is realising that hardly anyone so much as approaches the ideal of the Ultimate Adult. One need not look far to find instances of legal adults - as determined by age and ability to contribute economically, politically and socially - exhibiting typical "childish" behaviours. Even the accumulation of knowledge is not guaranteed with age. Ignorance, sometimes shocking quantities of it, is prevalent even among those who have had both the time and the opportunities to know better.

Do "adults" really exist? Or is everyone frightened, lost and fumbling on the inside, while putting up a collected appearance on the outside? Is this whole business of the Ultimate Adult just a complex game of one-upmanship?

I can speak for myself, that I don't feel like an adult. I'm old enough to decide on national issues, operate mobile mechanical deathtraps, and purchase orally-ingested mind-altering chemicals. I have an income, I pay rent and taxes, I plan and cook my own meals. If I fall ill, have to apply for a visa, have to apply for anything - I handle it, all by myself. I have to teach people who know less than myself. I am personally in charge of work which could cost my boss a lot of money, if something went wrong. I have responsibilities. 

And I'm still such a child on the inside. I'm frequently frightened, often lost, often helpless, often  anything but calm and level-headed. I'm silent at the wrong time and speak when I shouldn't.

They don't give you a handbook, about being an adult, but maybe there's nobody to write one.